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That joke only took fifteen years to set up, I hope you all appreciate it!

I’ve been playing some Spiderman on PS4. Dang, it’s so good! But, also, Spiderman literally knocks hundreds of villains unconscious, sending them flying into brick walls or other hard objects, or smashing their heads into steel girders. I find it slightly hard to believe a few of these dudes aren’t DOA or dying in hospitals from traumatic head injuries! You’d also think New York would just run out of criminals considering the number of guys Spidey takes out of commission in the span of a few weeks. Although he’s still no Batman, since Bruce wipes out at least the same number of burly angry guys in the Arkham games over the course of a single night, also, APPARENTLY with no casualties on his part!

Incidentally, in Assassin’s Creed, you’re always playing as characters who murder literally hundreds, if not THOUSANDS, of people out in the open with all sorts of martial arts tricks and crazy gadgets, and yet you’re apparently not a part of a known history? You’d figure there’d be some sort of historical note about a cowled fighters single handedly killing dozens to hundreds of people at a time in the streets of cities across the world.

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  • foducool

    lmfao anticlimactic af

    • suburban_samurai

      We aims to please!

  • Astralfury

    Ken is the best character so it’s fitting he gets The Best Girl.

    • Stephen Martin

      The Best Girl is the one that doesn’t speak?

      • suburban_samurai

        Technically she’s just someone of few words.

        • Astralfury

          We’ve established that you can’t shut Ken up with words. It takes a tree trunk to the chest to do it.

          • Ginger Mayerson

            And Yumiko is just the girl of few words to do it.

      • Kid Chaos

        It all depends on your point of view, I guess. :)

  • Little Kingsguard

    That’s not Mt. Fuji! That’s not Mt. Fuki at all!

    • Minando

      He did not get Mount Fuji (or Fuki). All he got was a rock.
      Just a rock.

      • Kid Chaos

        But it was a big rock! (I bet he lugged it here all the way from Mt. Fuji, too!) 😜

        • Milamber33

          … I think it’s literally meant to be the top of Mt Fuji. Still not the whole mountain though.

          As a sidenote, is that why Mt Fuji has a crater at the top? Because Bunzo ripped the top off?

          • Kid Chaos

            Possibly, possibly… 😜

  • Viri

    Yumiko understands the most fundamental rule of combat.

    Paper always beats rock.

    • KungFuKlobber

      I wish I could upvote this 50 times.

      • charles81

        There! I just gave it the 50th upvote

    • Minando

      At least she didn’t fold it into an origami ox or something.

    • endplanets

      **Checks bottom corner of last panel**
      Yori is running with scissors.

    • Ilmari

      That was the best comment ever. Of all time.

  • KungFuKlobber

    Please take Bunzo along, please take Bunzo along, please take Bunzo along…

    • Minando

      ‘Why should we take YOU along?’

      ‘Because Bunzo strong in arms, but feeble in head, making him most best amusing company, prone to many practical jokes.’
      ‘…you know, for someone claiming to be an idiot you are pretty smart.’
      ‘Sorry to hear it, master *bows deeply*’

  • KungFuKlobber

    That game sounds a lot like Spider-Man 2 for GameCube/PS2/XBox, with the taking out of hundreds of bad guys and whatnot. One time I carried a random mook to the top of the Empire State Building and then piledrove him all the way down to the street. I think he probably ended up with a headache from that one.

    • suburban_samurai

      I’ve taken multiple selfies of Spidey crouching over his victim’s horrifically contorted bodies. They’re totally just unconscious, though.

  • Auroki

    A joke worth fifteen years lol

  • Crestlinger

    Just the tip, for easy transport.
    And yes, horses would be helpful, If they can catch up.

    • Kid Chaos

      “Horses? Where we’re going we don’t need…horses.” 😎

      • Hfar

        I am a simple person. Whenever I see a Back to the Future reference, I like.

  • Yasmin Mazur

    note about missing persons: USA last year had over 600 thousand missing person cases. that’s 0.2% of the population that people just don’t know where they’ve gone. You’d think a serial killer would tell about all their victims, but that’s also not true. People go missing. it’s not hard, even in the age of information with all those CC TV cameras around.
    An assassin that runs around killing people could get away with it as long as he bothers to hide the body in a reasonable place (like a swamp or the bottom of a lake – not the middle of the street). It will just be another case of a person getting lost. you can also burn the body to avoid leaving evidence of murder – the plage pits are also a good place for that, as well as random graves in cemetaries…
    If he doesn’t clean after himself – the organization that he’s fighting also has an interest to get rid of the bodies to avoid the attention of the authorities.
    All in all – the question of why doesn’t anybody notice all those bodies around is the least of the factual problems in those games.

    • suburban_samurai

      Ha, I mean, we’re not talking about an accumulation of missing persons, we’re talking about a single person killing, like, a hundred guys in the courtyard of government buildings throughout written history!

      • KungFuKlobber

        But all the newspapers and printing houses are controlled by Illuminati Faction A and Illuminati Faction B, and neither of them want evidence of their quasi-secret war published.

      • Yasmin Mazur

        did you know that in WW2, the turks slaughtered over a million armenians – and did not acknowlege it until today…
        there are mass tumbs uncovered in all sorts of places and people have no idea how the people got into them. History is shining a flashlight on a huge area of darkness – if nobody wrote about it, and if someone else went around burning books and scrolls – we will not know about it.
        The fact that one man can actually kill a whole castle full of people is more impossible than nobody preserving the record…
        Besides – it’s not like those games aim for historical accuracy – if they did – they would find a city or something that did actually get that treatment – Croatoan…

  • Arkone Axon

    This means she lived… good!

  • Sunwu

    I want Bunzo to join them and use the rock some how

  • Xinef

    And from this day “brick jokes” shall be known as “Mt. Fuji jokes” forever after.

  • Vincent Van Laak

    Since I don’t see another link, the rock thrower first arrived back yonder:

    • purplelibraryguy

      Holy crap the art is so much more impressive now.

      • Kid Chaos

        Really? I always thought the art hit its’ peak right about here. :)

        • Ginger Mayerson

          It’s a relationship and a journey with NN4B. No, please don’t ask me to explain.

          • Kid Chaos

            No need. :)

  • Jonathan Andrus

    *golf clap* mad props on the long setup, and on the longevity of sics a great comic!

  • Hfar

    “Would you like horses?”

    “Naw! We’ve all maxed out our edurance stats, so we can actually outrun horses by this point.”

    • suburban_samurai

      “Would you like to take this jet plane to get across the country faster?”
      “Naw, that’s cool, I’ve got a grappling hook.”

      • Ginger Mayerson

        “Would you like to ride in this limousine?”
        “Hell yes.”

  • animalia555

    Because if I don’t say it somebody else will…

    “Rock falls, nobody cares”

  • endplanets

    Oh yea, horses exist.

    It like in LOTR when Gandalf tells the Hobbits to just walk into Mordor… and then rides off on his sweet sweet horse.

  • EternalLurker

    Just seeing the first panel and immediately remembering the origin of this brick — err, rock — joke had me in stitches. Ah, memories.

    I’ve played enough of PS4 Spider-Man to have experienced pretty much everything the game has to offer, and I still have yet to see anything in it that previous Spidey games didn’t do as well or better, aside from some (but not all) aesthetic aspects. It’s a fine game and all, but it’s not anything unique, and compared to Amazing Spider-Man’s combat and mobility options it’s honestly multiple steps backwards. Why this game has been so incredibly hyped up while ASM was mostly ignored is beyond me, aside from the fact that they came out alongside film versions of Spidey which were respectively treated the same way.

    • suburban_samurai

      If the Amazing Spiderman games were as good as this new one, then they certainly deserve more credit. Were the stories as engaging?

      • EternalLurker

        Hm…having played the PS4 Spider-Man in disorganized chunks at a few friends’ places rather than in one sitting, I suppose I might not have gotten a proper presentation of the story, so I’ll have to reserve judgment on that front. Mechanically, I just miss ASM’s stealth options, Retreat button (a context-sensitive ever-present option which makes Spidey immediately web-zip towards the nearest area which has the least enemy eyes on it), more fluid combat dodge options…just generally waaaaay more mobility. If you think PS4 MSM has cool mobility options when swinging around Manhattan, you’ll love ASM, wherein you can do things like hold down the web-zip button to slow down time, aim at a precise point even in mid-air, and send Spidey EXACTLY there…even if he has to find a path by running along walls and flipping across lamp-posts to do it.

        I suppose it’s not fair to say ASM’s mobility options are “better”, exactly, as that’s subjective, but they definitely make the player feel way more powerful. In MSM, that feeling of power seems to come more from various web shots and unlockable suit tech than from raw speed and fluidity of motion, which is…fine, I guess, but doesn’t really capture the part of the character which I think lends itself best to a fun gameplay experience.

        But I’ll keep the story thing in mind and give the game a…less disjointed playthrough the next time I’m in front of it. And I definitely do love the aesthetic presentation, at the least. It does a lot of cool-looking, comic-book-y things and pays incredible attention to detail. The memory that’s stuck with me the most from my experiences is when I took down some robbers at a store, and the camera switched to a side-view watching the action from the street, essentially granting the player the perspective of a bystander watching Spidey at work. Little things like that just make the game’s overall presentation so very elegant that it’s hard to be too disappointed in the things that are missing from prior installments.

  • Nos Rin aka CTCO

    you know what I hate about the new spiderman game? it’s not on PC. :S

    • suburban_samurai

      And it never will be, unfortunately! (well, outside of rom hacks)

      • Nos Rin aka CTCO

        *cries PC master race tears*

      • Nos Rin aka CTCO

        if I were to get a new console it would be a switch before a PS4…..

      • Nos Rin aka CTCO

        I’m not smart enough for rom hacks. also too lazy lol.

  • Ginger Mayerson

    Y’know, my memory must be going; I had to look this up in the very handy character reference (thanks for that, guys). Yes, totally worth the 15 year set-up. Good work, m’lads, very good work.

    • Ilmari

      Yup, it is, I think, the brick-joke to end all brick jokes. An artwork in itself.

  • Darkseide

    so he took that part of Mount Fuji?

  • Frank Royce Harr

    Heh. :)

    Horses? We don’t need no stinkin’–oh, wait. Horses would be, like, totally sweet. Still stinky but sweet.

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