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Looks like it’s time for some water aerobics!

Okay, guys! Only two and a half more weeks until Nioh comes out! I fear that I won’t be able to pull myself away from the controller once that happens, considering they had a ‘last trial’ demo this weekend that I definitely played too much of despite having many other pressing matters to attend. I can’t recall another game action game that’s felt so good to play! There’s something about the precision of the controls, and the tension of managing the ki meter of both you and your enemy that makes each fight enthralling. Also, those authentic feudal Japanese weapons are just a killer good time to be had! When I discovered this ‘last trial’ demo added in the kusarigama I couldn’t supress a geekgasm. Tearing up yokai with the sickle and chain is a blast!

The Dark Souls games get called tough but fair, and yet in my experience with them, I always feel like I’m fighting the controls. There’s notable lag, uneven hit boxes, weird clipping issues, and strange physics going on all over the place. Nioh doesn’t put up with any of that crap. It’s surgically precise samurai action. I suspect Nioh will proudly sit along side the big boys of top tier action games like Bayonetta 2, Devil May Cry 3, Vanquished, and Metal Gear Rising (I may be a Platinum Games fanboy), while potentially being the best Souls-style ‘tough but fair’ games to date. It’s THAT GOOD.

. . .

Also, thank the gods they got rid of weapon durability, ’cause I hate that mechanic. I’m looking at you, Breath of the Wild!

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  • Pumpkin_Cake

    Tang is really channeling his inner American drill sergeant.

    • suburban_samurai

      It’s always his default state, now his just adding the typical lingo.

  • KungFuKlobber

    “No stunt doubles to stand in for you THIS time! That’s what you get for spending all the budget on water physics!”

  • Jake

    hmmm… “tang-y boosh! now with a spwash of cho.” it’s time to open up a can of whoop spwash!

  • Flaming Squirrel

    Little does history know, the Wu Tang brothers are responsible for the invention of the wave pool.

    I haven’t looked into Nioh, but as a fan of the Souls games (beat 1, decent way into 2) I’ll have to look into it once I finally get a PS4. Have you played Bloodborne? Personally, the Victorian England/HP Lovecraft setting looks a lot cooler than medie val fantasy or samurai/ninja Japan.

    • suburban_samurai

      I like Bloodborne, but I haven’t beaten it, and that unstable framerate and 30fps max kinda hurts the gameplay. Also the controls are baffling and there’s no way to change the default setup. Why is dodge the circle button and not the X button? Why can’t I map the attacks to square and triangle? It took some getting used to and led to a lot of frustration that would’ve been easily curbed by alternate control scheme options. And as fun as Lovecraftian horror is, I know this will shock you but I still freakin’ love feudal Japan and Japanese mythology way more. Nioh is a game that’s just perfectly within my wheelhouse and I’m ravenous for its release!

      • Flaming Squirrel

        Hmm. Those controls sound exactly like Dark Souls, so I could probably jump in and play a lot easier than you did. This does make me wonder, though: how many games are going to be able to copy Souls’ gameplay before it becomes the next Call of Duty? We’ve got Souls, Bloodborne (which may not count since it was made by the same people), Nioh, Lords of the Fallen, and there’s even one set in a scifi robot-y world. I really don’t want the market to become so oversaturated with these that everyone starts to hate them say they’re not innovative enough!

        • suburban_samurai

          I don’t think there are as many of these games as you think! And thus far the ones that exist have mostly been very competently made with a lot of thought put into the world setting, enemy designs, and combat variation. Heck, Nioh’s combat with alternate stances for each weapon and balancing both your and the enemies’ stamina bars adds a whole new great dimension to fights! There are thousands of rote military shooters out there, but only dozens of these punishing action adventure games that emphasize expert play, so I suspect it will be a while before they’re as cookie cutter and over saturated as FPS games.

  • Xinef

    – Where’s Cho?
    – Oh, he’s just chilling out with a priest and a guru in that bar over there!

    • suburban_samurai


  • Hfar

    “Where’s Cho?”
    Yo! The Cho be on the down low so you better go, man ho.

  • Sunwu

    Well-a! Splish splash, Cho was takin’ a bath! ‘long about a Saturday night!
    A rub dub, just relaxing with his buds!, thinkin’ everythin’ was all riiight!!!

    And then-a!
    Bing bang, Cho saw Wu and Tang! Fightin’ on the paddies of rice!!!!!
    Flip flop, they gave Cho’s friends the drop! All strugglin’ in the water and mud!

    They was a-splishing and a-splashing Reeling with the feeling Moving and a-grooving
    Rocking and a-rolling, yeahhhh!!!

    There was Fumio! and-ah! Fujio too! they tried to run away but there was nothin’ they could do!
    A-well-a, splish splash, Cho went to help out in a flash! ‘long about a Saturday night!

    He was a rolling and a-strolling Reeling with the feeling
    Moving and a-grooving
    Splishing and a-splashing, yeahhhh!

    (Bobby Darin: Splish Splash)

  • Bree

    The Mighty Boosh knows know equals in sound effects.

    • suburban_samurai

      What of DOOM?

      • Bree

        Well, DOOM could be a superior or an inferior depending on your opinion! I said it had no equal!

        (Also, I was making a reference which is so obscure even I don’t know that much about them.)

    • Jake

      i beg to differ! KADOOSH has no equal! because it’s also a game. and one Ken likes to play. Also, i do not wish to anger the Ken for dissing his game…

  • Znayx

    So, you know guys… About that Switch hype you were getting worried about. Several things y’all were questioning got a proper answer at the official reveal of the system. I’ve got information for most things you could ask about it, but I learned it all from essentially this video (below) plus commentary from streamers doing extra research along with the live presentation, so just watch this and if you have more questions… Well, there’s no reason not to ask them.

    • Znayx

      Yes I know several parts are cringey or awkward… But you know, it’s a bunch of Japanese nerds selling their toy to us. Make sense?

    • suburban_samurai

      Watcha talkin’ bout, Znayx? There are so many questions the presentation didn’t answer, although some of it has been kind of answered in press interviews after the fact. Like backwards compatibility with older systems’ games (there is none), carrying over previous virtual console purchases to the switch (no comment at this time), are external hard drives compatible (not at launch, but maybe in the future), how much will the online service cost (no comment), etc.There’s still a lot of uncertainty about switch. And then there’s the price of all the peripherals. $50 for a joycon, $80 for a pair of joycon, $70 for a pro controller, $90 for a base to hook to another TV if you want to use the Switch with multiple TVs, $30 for a charging hand grip for the joycons. It’s a pricey system, especially keeping in mind that no game comes bundled with it and 1, 2, Switch is $50 for a tech demo. Not that I’m trying to hate on Switch, I still preordered it, but it’s a muddled mess of information, or lack there of, at this time. Also a lack of launch titles.

      • Znayx

        Yes, it lacks launch titles. That question was answered. Yes, it has a reasonable, non-depressing amount of good upcoming titles. That question was answered. Price on peripherals was elaborated on by streamers more than Nintendo themselves, probably to avoid embarrassment. Same thing with backwards compatibility, as you said for press interviews answering that. And touch screen capability was discovered in the patents.
        Was Virtual Console tranfering answered? No. Okay. But here are things that were answered, for which I’m happy.

        My question about whether the Wii’s motion capabilities would be ditched forever was answered — And I’m really, really glad that they kept motion. Oh, and connecting multiple devices for local multiplayer, not just online service or couch multiplayer? F*** yeah. I also wondered whether there would be any way to make the tiny Joycons
        more comfortable in players’ hands. They brought up the wrist straps,
        with the attachment that makes them more round.

        They answered the question about what the new Mario title will be like. That’s something that was on everybody’s minds. And, many people were just like “So the new Zelda game looks cool, but so far we just see Link wandering wherever in this grassland… Are there any other places? What’s the storyline?” And that was partly answered/teased. A Wii Sports type launch game to familiarize with the Switch’s mechanisms? Indeed.

        So if any of those things were on a person’s priority questions list, they’re answered. Most of the presentation they just went over games, yes, so the focus wasn’t so much on features of the switch to answer technical questions. But I’m much more satisfied than just watching the teaser trailer, aren’t you?

        • suburban_samurai

          Oh, for info on Mario Odyssey and BotW, sure, I’m very hyped for those games! Granted Mario won’t be out until winter at earliest (and let’s not forget that Nintendo is notorious for delaying their games, BotW had an original release year planned for 2015). The entire launch lineup is currently five games, and over the coming months it seems like we’ll mostly be getting updated ports of WiiU games. So, no, I’m not THAT satisfied. I think the Switch will have incredible software support in a couple of years, if Nintendo truly intends to merge its portable devs with its console devs into one system, while also making its entire backlog of virtual console games available, including gamecube titles. THEN I will be more than satisfied! They just haven’t really talked about any of that.

  • purplelibraryguy

    Any second string character can tell you–It’s never “enough running”.

    • suburban_samurai

      The bandits are well aware of this.

      • purplelibraryguy

        I noticed that in the second frame there they were going flying, and in the last frame there they were . . . not there. Guess they decided to pass on Wu/Tang’s suggestion.

        • suburban_samurai
          • Xinef

            As they say, whenever someone tells you “There is no escape!” you just show them the upper left-hand corner of your keyboard.

          • Bree

            Unless you have the misfortune of having that key be broken and/or missing.

            Speaking from experience: it sucks when there is in fact no escape.

          • purplelibraryguy

            Doesn’t one of the new Macbooks have no Escape? Something symbolic there . . .

          • jULES

            Sometimes ctrl+alt+del can help in times like that…

          • clogboy

            Or you press the ‘Help’ button (F1) by accident.

      • Kid Chaos

        It is on like Donkey Kong! 😎

  • Bob

    Looks like Elmer Fudd was assigned for the sound effects on this page.

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