Ryoushi’s not just gonna let that whole arrow stunt slide. It’s suicide time! This is like Genchu’s worst day ever.
So I saw this movie, maybe you’ve heard of it, GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY! It’s okay, I guess! Have some of my stupid opinions, why not-
Pros: So much funny banter! Peter Quill is my new favorite Marvel character maybe I guess? Yeah, I think he is. Also, cool spaceships, I like ‘em!
Cons: CARTOON PHYSICS! Everyone bounces off explosions and flops around like indestructible plastic fish and then the movie says “fear their possible demise!” and I’m like “nope, sorry, movie. You have gone out of your way to TEACH ME that spaceship crashes and explosions do not hurt these people and I can no longer feel an ounce of concern for their well being!!” It kind of makes the supposed emotional stuff at the end a bit less so, is all I’m sayin’. SOME TONAL INCONSISTENCY!
To be fair, my cons basically apply to all the Marvel movies (although Captain America 2 did a much better job of grounding its story than most). Tell me I’m not the only one getting tired of the over CG’d action adventure experience! I think it’s not so much the quality of the effects that hurts newer films but the lack of restraint in how much stuff gets put into them. There’s no room to digest the big impressive set pieces because you’re already onto the next ‘ooh ahh’ moment! Slow down, movies, take a breather, I can only ‘ooh ahh’ so much before I stop caring. Try showing us something impressive, then relaxing for a little bit before showing us the next impressive thing. IT’S CALLED PACING and I remember a time where it was very effectively implemented in films. Also make your movies shorter! GEEZ DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE OVER 2 HOURS LONGS NOW!!! Concise storytelling can actually be a pleasurable viewing experience, you know!
PS. Did anyone else think of The Last Starfighter when those little fighter ships linked up to create a force field?Published on by Alex Kolesar